Home » Cooking » Dimwit Recipe: Smashin’ Cucumber Salad

Dimwit Recipe: Smashin’ Cucumber Salad

With the daily temperature rising upwards north of 37C, mixed with haze and smell of acrid smoke of open-burning (courtesy from Indonesia), no wonder people around me are going apeshit!

So what’s a cooling salad that’s quick and easy to toss up – and perfect for stress release?  A Smashed Cucumber Salad, came to mind.  This is  extremely   easy to make, even the dimwit goes, “Smashin’ stuff!”  It’s Healthy and  Cheap! Cheap! Cheap!

Basic ingredient:


Sesame oil*
Honey (optional)
Apple-cider vinegar (or any vinegar based dressing)
Pinch of salt

Excellent observation, Watson!   If you notice that I have left out the quantity, that’s because I’m just a novice home-cook, not a chef (yet).  😄

Well, the seasoning is entirely up to you – whether you want it hot, sweet or garlicky.  The key ingredients here are the cucumbers, sesame oil – sesame oil being key to Asian cooking to impart the nutty flavour and fragrance, vinegar (any brands/kinds you have on hand) and a pinch of salt.  Add 5 minutes to chill in the fridge.


Cucumber, garlic, chilli (I’m making mine hot and garlicky)

STEP 1:  Cut both ends of the cucumber off.  The key point to remember is to rub both ends of the cucumber to get rid of bitterness, note the white gunk.


White bitter gunk – excuse my undressed nails

If you are a dunce at chopping lovely even pieces, this is a perfect salad for you!

STEP 2:  Simply  use the back of the chopper to smash the cucumber to bits – perfect if you are in need of stress release or rehabing in anger-management treatment.  Then scoop the seeds out.  Old-wives tales suggested that uneven jagged pieces pick up more of the dressing but my modern scientific brain tells me that there are more surface areas to pick up the dressing.  *Duh*


Whack and smash the cucumber

STEP 3:  Chop up the chili and mince the garlic cloves (optional step – only if you like your salad to be hot and garlicky)

STEP 4:  Make the dressing by mixing sesame oil, honey and apple cider vinegar together

STEP 5:  Place cucumber pieces in a large bowl and toss with a pinch of salt.  Cover and let rest in the refrigerator for 5 minutes.

There we have it – a healthy crunchy and garlicky, uh-so marvellous salad that is SO cool and refreshing – and SO very cheap!


Smashed Cucumber Salad

Best to eat immediately.

To make this salad even more abridged and simpler – and because I realised how much cleaning up I had to do after the smashin’ part, I made an even more  basic version I have pictured below – Chopped Cucumber Salad.

Simply chop up 1 cucumber (don’t worry about scooping out the seeds).  Rub both ends of the cucumber. Toss in store-bought honeyed apple-cider vinegar, sesame oil and a pinch of salt.  Leave it to chillax in the fridge before serving.   Voila!  Another fantastically easy salad!

*Ya, dimwits.  I hear y’all roaring with cheers!  Haha!  Thanks!  😘 *


Chopped Cucumber Salad

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